June 28, 2010

Re: I love you!!‏ June 27, 2010

Mom,

I'm so sorry for the short e-mails but I'm now at a library where I am timed so I have to get off quicker than I would like. I miss Sister Mitchell so much!!! We got along so well. She has been one of my favorites! I love her so much! She lives in Utah so I'll get to see her soon in fact if she doesn't get married to quick I'll go and live with her a bit before school starts. Oh man I love her.

Well I'm now in Orange park and there is nothing but rich white people here. It's definitely different and I'm kind of having a hard time. My new comp is sister Waddoups and she is very... meek.... ok ok she really quiet and I don't know what to do with a quiet person! I'm not quiet at all and it's like pulling teeth to get her to talk and when she does she is so quiet that I keep having to say.. what? It's really a change from all the rest of my companions but I think it will be a good one. I think I'll grow the most in this transfer than any of my others; that's for sure, I feel like I'm training. She has been out a transfer longer than me but she has had lazy or dominate comps that I think kind of shut her down, so it is my goal to open her up and make her solid and confident and get her to talk out loud and proud. That is my task as well as to baptize like crazy! They haven't had a baptism here in awhile but that is all going to change.

Oh man. I miss jax second soooooo much!!!! It was like I had a moment of greatness and for a moment I thought I would stay there but I think God was teasing me and showing me what I could have if I work hard and become that missionary he needs me to be.

I'm glad you liked my videos. I still have so much more. Oh and I need a print of everyone's birthday please! I hate missing birthdays! Lame! I may be a missionary but I like to at least send a card.
I know I know. Another short letter but I have to go. I take a long time to type but I'm getting better. Everything is fine here. I feel your prayers and I have my Heavenly Father and my Savior for guidance and comfort. They help me so much. So I'll be just fine. I love you all so much!
Next letter will be better I promise~

Love,
Your sister missionary~

June 22, 2010

Excerpts from Mom & Shanna's letters 6-21-2010

Mom,
I'm Being Transferred Again!!! Oh man. I was a little mad at first; I found out, tossed the phone and took a walk outside. Oh man I was not a happy camper. We have been praying this entire transfer that we would not be split up, but God knows best. I love my companion so much! I have learned so much from her. She has made me really look at myself and ask myself some hard questions about who I was, who I am and who I want to be. This mission does not last forever and I need to decide right now if this is going to stick or is this going to be a great learning experience for 18 months. If I want to be more than I am I cannot come home the way I was when I left and I can never go back. I need to change. Everything I have spend 21 years building up was good but God did not send me here to be and stay that person but he sent me here to be the me that He sees. For our last presidents interviews president didn't interview but gave everyone blessings instead and President Newman said that this is the time that I will draw from for the rest of my life. This is the moment in my life that will determine the rest of my life. It made me realize how much I can't be that same person. I can't be anything less than what the lord expects. I know that sounds a little crazy but if I'm not going to change, than what is the point in the Lord molding me here to go right back when I get home. Things are going to be different, but a good different. I'm excited for the learning that comes with that and the greater understanding of things that my Father in Heaven has in store for me. I have to give it all up to know him and I will.

In my talk I said that if God asked me to give my life for this gospel I would. And I meant it, but then I said thankfully God does not ask us to give our lives for it but asks us to just obey him. I sat down and thought. Yes he does. He doesn't mean our mortal existence but he does mean everything in this mortal existence. I am called and set apart from the world. We are not in the world nor does God intend to save us in our sins but from our sins, the same is that God does not direct us if we are of the world but if we are apart from it. Do you see how much I don't want to be away from my companion. The one that has made me truly take a look at myself and help me change. She is a rock and I love and admire her more than she will ever know and so thankful to her that she was my companion even for the short amount of time that she was. She goes home in 3 transfers. Needleless to say, we balled our eyes when we found out. I love her and will miss her and everyone in my area and district. I love my ward and have gotten so close to them. But I can still be sent back here because so they say " 6 week areas don't count." So maybe I'll die (end) here in the promise land when that time comes. Plus all the elders that I serve here with I go home with so I don't have to worry about that but I love sister, Mitchell! My strawberry and little Honey nut cheerio.

I love you all so much and i'm so excited for Christopher! I can't wait!!!! I want letters back from all the kids that would be nice. Oh man. tell christopher not to be nervous and just testify all the time through the entire talk and the spirit will be there and will guide the talk. He will do fantastic! I love him and all the kids so much!!!!!! Oh man!

I love you all~
Your sister missionary~

Shanna,
I'm so happy that you're doing better. I wasn't really worried about you. You are stronger than you think. I will keep praying for you and Adam and I hope the test results are good. I'm glad they did some test to kind of figure out what is going on so at least you'll know. You are such a rock. I don't know if I would be able to handle it, but thankfully you have. Adam and you have the Savior that loves you and can take away all that pain and stress, plus a Heavenly Father that adores you and family for support. I love you so much and am so thankful for your example. I couldn't have asked for a better sister, in fact I'm pretty sure I picked you out myself in heaven, as well as the rest of my family.

This is happening all for a reason, I know it. God is preparing you for something bigger and he needs you to be ready for it. Read your patriarchal blessing and pray and read what it says about your family and what you are to become as a woman of God and maybe you will find, just maybe, a reason for all of this. I love you so much! I love Adam so much too and I have no doubt that he is taking care of you and I love him so much for that. I can't say it enough!!!!!!!!!!

Elder Nelson when he came to speak to us said something way cool that has changed the way I look at things, he said. "Don't waste ten grams of today's energy on the mistakes of yesterday, for heaven sake, get over it! You can't keep looking in the rear view mirror while you drive; you're going to get into a wreck." I loved it so much! It was so blunt and exactly what I needed. He also said when it gets hard and you keep thinking of what I could have done or what I should have said or shouldn't have said, it's just a waste of time, he goes onto say "take ten steps breathe and leave it behind."

I can't tell you what a whirl wind this week has been. The Farnsworth's from my old ward in Whitehouse came to take me and my comp for lunch but really they came to give Sister Mitchell some bad news. Her Uncle whom she is very close to had a heart attack and died. Her dad was never really a strong father figure in her life so her uncle kind of took over in that area. I can't tell you how amazing my companion is. She is a rock! It took her a full day of crying and a good long prayer to her heavenly father for her to understand what is going on. Then we went back to work. I would be devastated. I don't know but she depends completely on the Savior and he gives her strength. Man I love her so much. We also found out that I'm being transferred again! I was really mad at first but it will be ok. I have trust in the Lord that it will turn out. I'm just really going to miss my companion. She only has three transfers left. Wow. Time flies so fast.

I love you so much and I'm so proud of you. I'm so excited for this next transfer. There is more learning with every transfer and I'm excited for that learning experience.

I love you and Adam so much and your package will be sent this week before I go. I love love love love you!
Your sister missionary~

June 21, 2010

HAPPY FATHERS DAY!! June 21, 2010

HAPPY FATHERS DAY!!!!!!!

Oh my gosh Dad you are so awesome!!! I hope that my husband is as crafty as you. That is so amazing! Mom must have freaked! You would have thought that it was mother's day or something. I'm so happy that you had a good father's day and I hope you thought the card was funny. It reminded me of you. I loved it and laughed for weeks about it. I hope everyone liked the stuff I sent and that those letters got to the Grandmas and Coffman's. I thought it would have been easy that way.

Dad I love you so much!!!! My talk went really well. I talked a lot about the relationship with my father in heaven and my father on earth. I talked about our letters home in relation to our prayers home. I talked about eternal families and our purpose here and understanding the priesthood and who we are; the understanding that we are children of God.

You wrote something to me in my first area; you said,

"I love you, please write, I want to hear from you if not as much or more than your mommy. I love you, please write, I've been feeling a little neglected, If you could just mention or acknowledge that you got my letters or that I exist. I want to hear from you. I love you, please write."

I used this quote as a basis for my talk about a father's love and the importance of talking to our fathers and especially our Father in heaven. He just wants to talk to us.

"I love you please talk to me, I want to remind you of who are. I love you, please talk to me, I'm feeling a little neglected, just acknowledge or mention that you've received my blessings or that I exist. I want to hear from you. I love you, please talk to me."

I love my heavenly father so much and I know that it is because you love him too more than anything else in the world that you have become the father that you are. I went on and on about you and my thankfulness that my father understands me so much that he knew I would need my savior in order for me to come back to him and help me through this life. When I sat down the next speaker said something like, how great it would be if we all could be loved as fathers as sister Pedersen knows and loves her father.

I hope you know how much I love you! I truly want to marry someone like you. I tell mom that all the time. You and Christopher are the key to what I want in a husband and I say Christopher because he is just the new and younger version of you. lol

I love you so much and I hope you had a fantastic father's day!

Your sister missionary~

June 14, 2010

Re: Summer is here!!

Thank you mommy~ I love you so much! Thank you for all of the support you give me. I'm sorry this letter is going to be very short because I took most of all my time writing to Shanna so I hope that the package makes up for the lack of a letter. I am doing a lot better this week. We finally have people to teach! I'm so excited! Prayers are being answered and I’m learning to trust and push forward the best I can. I love you Mom so much! Thank you for everything that you do for me!
I love you!

I love you daddy! I am giving a talk about you on Father’s day in my ward. I'm so excited! I love my daddy! I think I’m going to cry through the entire thing but it's going to be great! I was nervous when they asked me to give a talk but then they said it would be on father’s day and I was like sweet! I can talk about my dad all day! I love my dad! I also can talk about My Heavenly Father all day long too. In fact I do! It will be good.
I'm so excited! We have our last president’s interviews with President Newman on Tuesday before he leaves at the end of this transfer. I'm going to miss him but I guess he is also going to give us all blessings before he leaves which is so sweet! He never does that! This will be like a Fathers blessing for me because that is how he gives us those blessings. So it will be on Tuesday so pray and tell Heavenly Father all the things you want to tell me and God will make sure I hear them as well as all the things that God wants me to know. I wish you could give me a blessing but that’s ok. I will picture you in my head. lol I love you so much!
I'm sorry that you are so sore but there is a scripture that goes along with that soreness. Helaman 3:35 it talks about becoming firmer and firmer in the faith. We use that for our work-outs. We become firmer and firmer inside and out. lol it's fun! 
I love you so much and I feel your prayers. Love you
Your sister missionary~


June 7, 2010

Love You!! June 6, 2010

Thank you Mom so much! I love you so much! You always give the best advice and give me the most confidence in myself after hearing from you.

This week was still pretty much the same as last week but this week we have one date! Honestly I hope he sticks with it and doesn't drop us. So far he is the only person that we are teaching and we just met him on Friday, so our teaching pool is suffering, which is where the lack of confidence comes from but I know that the Lord is preparing me for so much more and is just molding me into the person that he needs me to be to push forward and stand out. Everything will be ok and in the Lords timing.

I love my ward and they are very strong but we have about 500 less active members and a lot of them have been baptized in the last year or they are from a different country who use to meet as a branch but then were combined with our ward so they don't come anymore, so me and my comp are working on a lot of less actives to build up the ward even more and help the new members receive fellowship. One of the ways can be dinners but a non-member has to be present when we are over, we are also doing a lot of trade offs and trying to work more with the members than ever before. In the last 2 years the mission has kind of been anti ward and pro baptisms through the missionaries, and it worked for awhile and we gained lots of baptisms because missionaries were focused but now we have new members that aren't staying active because they have no attachment to the ward, just to their missionaries and so when the missionaries leave, there goes the new member. It's sad. So now we are working on that.

I think my testimony is stronger more than ever but I still can work on it and improve it. I love the gospel with my whole heart and I really have learned who I do and don't want to be when I get home. My Savior has shown me the way and I am giving up everything to follow Him. I love it here!!

Mom I love you so much and I hope you know how much you mean to me. I love you!

~Your sister missionary~
 

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